A light in the darkness

  Have you ever observed what words you use to praise your kids? Let me introduce you to a few. "My colleague's son or daughter got this many marks, and you still scored second place ." "How intelligent is he or she?" "My colleague's son or daughter is very talented ." If we closely observe the underlined words, they are all the results we got, and we praise the child for achieving the results. Such praise makes them become result-oriented and forget to enjoy the process that makes it happen. Words are double-edged swords. Yes, words of encouragement are important for kids. They work miracles in their lives. But, at the same time, if we are not careful with our words, they may backfire too. Kids are like a blank page in a book. For them, parents are everything. So they keenly listen to every word you say for them. They miss none. As I was writing these lines, I was reminded of one such incidence in my own life. My mother was very good at mat

"The best way to make children good is to make them happy."                                                                                      Oscar Wilde We live our life in stages. There is a childhood stage, adolescence stage, adult stage, and old age stage. We live them all and try to make each stages as good as possible. In our life this childhood and adolescent stage is much influenced by our parents and their parenting. The famous psychologist Alfred Adler mentions that the way a parent interacts with their child has an impact on the child's future. His studies show that the parenting styles could contribute towards  inferiority complex  in children.  Exploring about parenting lead me to discover that the aggressiveness in children is associated with their unmet needs. Jan Hunt in her book "The Natural child- parenting from the heart" some of the silly mistakes which we do where upbringing our children. She mentions that we objectify our babies and mani