Cunning complacency and craving certainity

Though the book considers complacency and certainness with the same angle as I was exploring to write this topic, a new insight struck my mind. I will incorporate my insight with the knowledge I gained from the book.

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines complacency as self-satisfaction, especially when accompanied by unawareness of actual dangers or deficiencies. To be satisfied is a good and healthy sign, but to choose self-satisfaction over growth is not at all worthy. So, I called this kind of complacency cunning, i.e., full of deceit and craftiness. I am poor, and I earn less. In this situation, being satisfied with rice, dal, and potatoes is a healthy and good sign. Now, this poor person says to herself, I can earn no more than this, so let me settle with this begging and live forever in poverty. Our lazy spirit is demonizing us to fix at this begging only. Such complacencies do not allow us to explore our real selves; rather, they say we are good where we are. I will cite the example of gutter water; they are stagnant water, and they smell like hell. When we become stagnant, our vision becomes restricted, our capabilities start looking limited, and our horizons scum to our thoughts. We ourselves put shackles on our flapping wings, saying this much is enough for me; I am satisfied. Even the swimming pool water is regularly changed and cleaned so that when we go inside the pool, we might not get infections or other unwanted things. 

I always thought that we should feel satisfied. I have tried to do that all the time. But as I was writing this section, I happened to revisit my life's stoppages and review whether my satisfied nature brought growth or stagnation. I think I have always tried to limit myself by being satisfied. We should know when to be satisfied and when to look for higher achievement. I will close this segment with Pat Riley's quote, which helped me to open my eyes and encouraged me to work on this segment: 

"Complacency is the last hurdle standing between any team and its potential greatness."

Indeed, the gap between me and my greatness is filled with satisfaction, which blinds me to seeing my true potential and working on it. I wore the clothes of satisfaction that shut the door to a new horizon, which is bountiful as well as brilliant. 

Now let us move on to the handcuffs of certainty. To be certain means to know what will happen next and plan in advance to safeguard oneself. We all know nothing is certain, but we still look for certainty. Why? We crave certainty because with it will come the arms of complacency, i.e., the robe of satisfaction from knowing everything and planning the escape. Not everything that is happening in your life calls for your knowledge and attention, but a fraction of it does. Knowing too much sometimes becomes a hindrance to progress. 

Here I am reminded of the movie "Final Destination." The beginning of the movie is quite interesting and full of fun, as they boarded the plane, but as the movie progressed, they escaped death. They should be happy and satisfied. No, this never happened because now they could see the impending death chasing them. They knew death was chasing them, and they lost the pleasure of life. This is what certainty plays with us. It makes us confident that this thing will happen only in this way, making us lose our flexibility to accept new things and the possibilities of bringing about change in our own selves. So, I found that certainties carve our existence, making us rigid and unchangeable. 

Life is beyond certainty. We all want to be certain and then relax, knowing that things will be done in this fashion only. Certainty gives the feeling of control, with me being the commander. We want to be well informed in our lives so that they run smoothly. We want to know what is happening in others lives to show our superiority and our command over them. We feel that when we know everything, we can do things for our own good and betterment. Aren't these the feelings and thoughts that run through our heads all the time? The truth is, life unfolds miraculously without our knowledge. We don't need to know everything; we just need to follow our inner voice to lead us. I remember those days of my life after my 12th when I had to choose what to do next. My whole family told me to join defense nursing as it would give me a me a settled life, a good income, etc. Yes, they were right with all their promising certainties. My heart was not happy with my decision. I did not listen to its soft voice and followed the certainity doldrum. I secured a seat, completed my training, and was settled well, but from there on, I failed to hear my inner voice. I was no longer able to get its sweet, leading guidance. I tried a lot after settling into my well-paid job, but I could no longer find myself. This troubled me a lot because I had tasted the pleasure of being with my own inner self, who loved to talk to me always, lead me, and at times even help me enjoy my life to the full. Where has it gone now? 

This feeling made me seek my inner peace. It took me years to once again listen to it and relearn to walk on a minute-to-minute basis with guidance from my inner self. I had times when I knew nothing about what was going to happen but just kept doing things that came in front of me. There were no outcomes I could see at that time. I left chasing results and followed on doing my part. Years later, I can see its benefits. One such incidence I will share. I shifted to a new place and was looking for a new job. I could not find one. It was frustrating to me. At that time, I saw a typing job. I was not good at typing at that time. I joined it. The job was difficult, but that made me practice typing even more. I did that sincerely. I did not know what would happen next. I kept trying for jobs but got no results. Then I joined a college, and I got it. There, I realized that my typing skill was a boon for me, and from there on, I have started using this typing skill exclusively on various projects. Had I been arguing about the use of this typing and this loss phase, I would never have mastered this skill and been as benefitted as I am now. I learned to trust myself. I learned not everything I needed to know at this moment. Some uncertainities are for my good, and I should cherish them, trusting my instincts. 

"The inner joy: The joy of discovering who we really are" speaks in this section about faith, which is the seed of certainity as we imagine things and carve them rather than letting things happen in their own ways. I am not very supportive of this argument by the writer, Hugh. We all know that our thoughts are excellent at ruminating, being skeptical (doubtful), and being mistrustful. Being uncertain doesn't mean that we doubt, are skeptical, or do not trust. To be uncertain means we do'n't know what is next. Doubt, skepticism, mistrust, and rumination are negative thoughts that ruin us. In order to fight them, we need to develop the habit of positive thinking. This is what faith does. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines faith as a firm belief (a positive way of taking things) in something for which there is no proof (meaning we are uncertain about it; it is not doubt but rather unknowingness). 

As I described my incident above, I was using this faith in myself to fathom the uncertainty that was present in front of me. When I was certain, I failed to hear the leading of my own self because I wanted to pace with the world and not with my inner conscience, which might not be in sync with the outer world. It is not necessary that what the world presents is my standard. My standards can be different, and for that, I need to hear myself. I need to refuse what the world is offering me, hold the hand of my inner self, and walk with it. 

This segment of my life is from my nursing college final year. My exams were about to start, maybe in a week or two. I was the mess secretary at that time. Something happened, and my tutors told me that I would have to be in the mess till the last day (just before my exams). There is no exam leave for me. My classmates showed their discontent with this, but there was no change. They all got study leave, but they did not give up. They all kept requesting on my behalf every day. At that time, I was like, Now what? I will not study, and let me fail. My friends never gave up, but they always gave me time to encourage me and fight for me with the tutors. I wrote my exam in this situation, and I cleared my exam. Reflecting on this after years of my life, I now understand why I was put on that extra duty. My tutors know that I have abundant energy, and it needs to be utilized well for me to perform well in my exams. My extra duties gave me impetus to just focus on the exam preparation and not on negative things, and that worked out well. I had been wondering all these years how I passed without studying so much. These all taught me that uncertainty is good. We don't need to know everything. If I were not in this uncertain situation, I would have never understood myself. I would have never discovered my true strength. 

I would like to end up this discussion with Christy Hall's quote which says: 

"This life is full of signs, many of which find their way to you exactly when you need them most."

We just need to learn to pick up these sings as an when they presents to us.

 

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