Unjust pain

 The second dimension of pain is the unjustness one feels when hurt.

Merriam-Webster online English Dictionary defines unjust as characterised by injustice; being unfair. Many times we are hurt not with the intention of harming but because we perceive it as unjust, and that hurts.

As I was writing this, I was reminded of one of the incidents that left a deep impression in my mind. In the place where I was posted, two of my senior madams were of the same commissioning batch: One was posted as matron in charge, so she availed herself of all the facilities of a manager—no long duties, no night duties, no ward duties, etc.; the other one was posted as a general duty matron; she has to do all the duties assigned by this matron. So, on my first night duty, I saw this person bringing the report book to the matron, throwing it on her table, and going off. It appeared so weird to me, but I kept quiet. As my days advanced in that place, I heard so many things from this senior madam, showing how much she feels unjust in this posting. She even mentioned that we both are of the same batch, but she puts me on every duty, and she herself enjoys all privileges, forgetting that she is posted as a manager and herself as a general duty matron.

This hurt made her speak all untoward words, demand all privileges, and show grudges and disrespect as well. They were not even talking properly.

Scientists have proved that our reward centres in the brain get activated when we see fairness, both with ourselves and with others. On the other hand, unfairness activates that part of thebrain,n which makes us angry and fearful.

Pondering over the topic of fairness and unfairness brought me to this anonymous quote, which speaks a lot.

"Life is unfair,

you put someone first, 

who puts you second.

You give 110% to someone in a relationship

who only gives 40%.

You're there for a best friend at 3:01 am

and the next day they don't pick up the phone.

And it always seems 

that you are giving them everything they demand

and they are just 

walking away with it. "

We have all been in this place at some point in our lives. We all have felt this unjustness with our near and dear ones now and then. If we keep counting them all, it will form a huge mountain that has no end. This feeling of unjustness never goes away. It multiplies, develops pus and sores, but never heals. Only the miracle of forgiveness can stop this ulcerative wound.

I will discuss how to manage this kind of pain in my future posts. Keep watching.

#WriteAPageADay